This is a bewildering time to be becoming a parent. We're moving into a new phase of our lives, where we'll need things we've never needed before, so naturally the commercial world is, charitably, doing its best to ease our transition into a new consumer demographic. It's really very generous of them. Personally, I find it interesting to see what the Baby Industrial Complex (thanks for that term to that man Greg Allen) thinks is the lifestyle to which modern parents - and particularly modern dads - should aspire.
Of course, young urbanites (as all people of our generation are trained to consider themselves) are design conscious, tech savvy, avid consumers of pop culture, and suckers for things with made-up scanidinavian-sounding names. Just because you're having a baby, that shouldn't get in the way of your continuing pursuit of nattily designed things called 'Juppe' or 'Huffi'. In fact, because you're having a baby, there are whole classes of thing you never needed before that you can now buy that can be nattily designed and called 'Lippike' or 'Trokko'. Like pushchairs, of course. Or urban baby assault carriers, as the marketing might have it.
There are pushchairs marketed on the basis that they're compatible with going to Starbucks; pushchairs you can take jogging, pushchairs you can take fell-walking. Of course, they're not all called pushchairs - they might be pramettes, or strollers, or travel systems, or amphibious landing craft. None of them are yet iPod compatible - so far as I'm aware - but it's only a matter of time before junior has a sound system hooked up to your playlist, and a dynamo on the pushchair's wheels is recharging your Nano as you go jogging. Wait a moment, I'm patenting that...
It's a seductive image - the idea that, once you've got a baby you can reinvent yourselves as hip young urban parents, go to coffee bars, take up jogging, and spend your weekends up a mountain in Wales. The idea that having a baby can fit in with a lifestyle that you don't even have now - how could you refuse?
Of course, the tragedy is that Chris and I did used to go road running - before the bump got in the way; we did go walking in Wales; we often do meet up with friends in Starbucks; most of our (nattily designed) furniture has curious scandinavian-sounding names. And damnit, I've got an iPod. Maybe we actually are the people the advertising is aimed at. Is it just me, or is that a bit creepy?
Wondering what's up with the pictures? So am I. I got a copy of the Microsoft Expression Codename "Acrylic Graphic Designer" October Community Technology Preview, or MECAGDOCTP for short, and I'm noodling about with it. I thought this post could benefit from a few illustrations demonstrating how ridiculous I will look as a stereotypical urban dad (if only I could get my hair to do that in real life)...